Tag Archives: Overcome

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Introspection

Self-assessment through a reflective gaze seems to be a daunting quest,
For to unfold the deepest of realms, in the corridors of memories one must invest,
Acknowledging progress and reliving achievements might feel wondrous to ingest,
While reminiscing failures and identifying defects might be hard to digest.

I have frequently succumbed to the chaotic cataclysm of the last 2 years,
It has been ground-breaking and perception shattering..facing and battling my fears,
It has been emotionally exhausting and mentally daunting..embracing the pain and wiping my tears,
It has been gruelling yet elevating, unlearning everything I was fed by society and discovering myself for real,
It has been exasperating yet forbearing, healing from the wounds of mental and physical ordeals,
It has been burdensome yet empowering, working towards turning my jeers into cheers,
Yet I have questioned everything I did, thought and felt seeking self-consciousness,
For in knowing oneself truly and completely is essential to attain internal consonance.

So my question to you is..do you ever sit down and look back on the year that’s passed by?
Do you reflect on your journey or are you a passer-by in your own life?
Do you see the things holding you back and figure out how to change things, or do you not even try?
Do you remain in a vicious cycle of sitting around whining and complaining, or do you envision battling the strife?
If not, then it’s time to start – just sit down and pick your brain apart,
Self-discovery will give more than money, fame and success can ever impart,
For wisdom and fulfillment comes not with age, but from looking within and learning from life until you depart.


Interlude

Meaning: An interlude is an instrumental passage that connects different parts of the song. Interludes generally do not have a fixed length and some artists may even use interludes to transition from one song to another in an album.

I know it’s been a while [(69+23) days] since I last posted, so this is the “passage” to fill you in on that gap. It’s been an arduous last few months (to say the least), as I tried to finally deal with the plethora of thoughts and emotions constantly rupturing my mind. It’s not been easy at all, if I’m being completely honest..but nothing is ever easy for me. People see me as this easygoing, gregarious being, but they wouldn’t be able to comprehend how challenging it is for this soul. The way I am, the dynamics of my cerebrum, the depth of my emotions..is all just too much for me to decompose sometimes.

I usually detach myself from my thoughts and emotions, and focus on others so that I don’t have to deal with myself. But the fact that almost everyone close to me was going through their own shit definitely added some base points to my mental misery index. Off late, I find it easier to help others first than to help myself, because I don’t feel like I am in complete control of myself..and that’s tough to delineate. But after a point, I know I have to get back to focusing on myself, sorting out the mess that I orchestrated or (very well) deserved to be on the receiving end of. I have had to deal with a range of emotions, which have been extremely shattering and consuming. Regardless, I have come to understand myself really well in this timeframe, and I feel that this level of self-awareness is counterproductive sometimes..and I just have to deal with it. I do spend a lot of time self-reflecting and figuring out ways to improve myself..be better, only to eventually convince myself that I am, indeed, a nice human being. For me, feeling that is very important in order to carry on..and I hope I don’t have to convince myself.

I have tried to constantly assess the blocking points in my head and have reasoned with some concurrent senselessness, which never seems to depart. This noise not only disrupted my peace of mind but also disturbed the sleep, which was quite exasperating. Trying to sort this out was a challenge, especially since I had started a new job and moved to a new country. It sucks when you can’t focus or feel motivated to work, but I gave myself the time to constantly evaluate my mental space and understand how I could come out of this sombre zone. Otherwise, I have tried to settle in and set a routine life here at Luxembourg, giving more time to things that make me feel better and motivated (mostly sports). I do feel like I’m getting there mentally, but I need to be more patient and strong. At the end of the day, I know that only I can change things that are under my control and I hope that I stop giving fucks about things beyond my control. I hope my headspace gets better and that, I can..actually..be happy. I know that anyone else in my position (at the surface level at least) would be quite ecstatic with where I am, but it’s difficult for me to be happy without inner peace, so I hope I get there soon.

Anyway, enough of “Bojack” vibes for now..I hope I can start writing more again, because I don’t want the creativity to only stem out of bad phases. I took a break to work on myself, and I feel that a good phase lies ahead..so I will try my best to make the most out of it. Regardless of everything, it is important to know that I am always extremely grateful for the life I have, the family that enabled this life and the people (you know who you are) that make this life worth living. So, I have to keep striving to attain this peace of mind that is in pursuit, and make everyone’s life better at the same too.

Will I be able to achieve this feat? Will I be able to write anything meaningful again? On va voir.

Till then, I have some album suggestions from 2022 for you to experience and vibe on:
Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers by Kendrick Lamar.
Dawn FM by The Weeknd.
A Light for Attracting Attention by The Smile.
Paradise Again by Swedish House Mafia.
Shape & Form by Two Feet.
Underrated by Ollie.
Twelve Carat Toothache by Post Malone.
Unlimited Love by Red Hot Chilli Peppers.
Melt My Eyez See Your Future by Denzel Curry.
Fever Dream by Cannons.
AM Gold by Train.
INSIDE (Deluxe) by Bo Burnham.
Rainless City by Channel Candice.
From a Birds Eye View by Cordae.
I Blame The World by Sasha Alex Sloan.
Based On A Feeling by Sabrina Claudio.
Caprisongs by FKA twigs.
I NEVER LIKED YOU by Future.
Come Home The Kids Miss You by Jack Harlow.
EXPLOSIONS by Three Days Grace.
Ramona Park Broke My Heart by Vince Staples.
Ego Trip by Papa Roach.
MORE D4TA by Moderat.
Dropout Boogie by The Black Keys.
Harry’s House by Harry Styles.
The Way That Lovers Do by Prateek Kuhad.

Also, the Sadnecessary (Acoustic) album by Milky Chance and Apoptosis by Inner Wave are worth a listen.